My ladies club was looking for members to run for offices…or perhaps I should say it was time for the changing of the guard. It seemed like there was only one candidate for every board position including President…and that didn’t sit well with me.
Living in the land of opportunity and choice, I felt that the members of my club deserved to have a choice of who to vote for for President, especially after hearing a lot of murmuring behind the scenes of people not being happy with their only choice put up by the nominating committee. I decided to walk the walk and talk the talk by having someone nominate me from the floor after finding I had much support.
What a shit-storm of controversy has been unleashed! I never thought such ridiculous animosity would be shown by so many. It is amazing and sad.
Though I’m weathering the storm, there are good days and very bad days. It was mentioned to me that I might be disqualified from even running because one of the qualifications is a year on the board in some capacity. I was on the board as Charity Chairperson and unfortunately got breast cancer before the end of my term. Being the honest person I am, I put this fact forward thinking that it was no biggie, I may not have attended every single board meeting as I was very sick, but I was consulted and involved.
Be careful what you assume, for I handed the opposition a loaded gun with a bullet in the chamber and they used it. The minutes were then gone over with a fine tooth comb to see if they could find if that constituted means for disqualification showing perhaps I had not served my full term. It has come to nothing, but to even resort to such under-handed sleazy means is despicable. So much for coming forward with the truth. The woman who unveiled this fact to me was a woman I had considered a friend, in answer to a totally unrelated question with no warning as if it was nothing then proceeded to tell me in front of others, since now their murmurings were obviously vocal that it was indeed a “secret” as she put her finger to her lips like a 3-yr. old and I wasn’t supposed to have told anyone. Really? She had let the Genie out of the bottle and now wanted to put him back in. Nope, ain’t happening!
What I can tell you is this position is for a Charity Women’s Organization, a glorified ladies lunch-club, so just imagine what nasty mud-slinging is common practice in real local politics, let alone Presidential which we’ve all seen live and cringed at. I don’t envy anyone who runs for office now that I know the real ugly truth!
Then again, we do expect to be represented so perhaps we need to teach our children, while young what the process is like and teach them fairness, respect for office and responsibility in voting for the best candidate. Maybe we should try to get them involved in their school politics. Everybody seems to want everything done for them and forgets that there are boards and people who help MAKE things happen for them. Nothing should be taken for granted, it doesn’t magically appear before you fully formed without someone chairing it!
The mantra I kept hearing from all the women in my Women’s Group was “I just want to have fun”….”I just want to go to my activities” “I don’t care about the politics”…..”I don’t want to get involved”. Well, that’s the problem. To not like the choice of candidate but not be willing to do something about it but talk trash, or ask someone else to do it isn’t all that helpful. Why does everyone want to complain but not want to take an active role themselves? It’s easier to let someone else do it….excuses range from – “it’s too hard”, “I’m too busy”, “I’ve got a lot going on in my life”, blah, blah, blah– if all politicians did that we’d have no government and anarchy! I understand being afraid to take part after this ugly fight, but I also have learned a lot of good, hard lessons.
I have learned people who were never my friends before are now better friends than people I thought were friends. We use the term friend too easily. People will smile-fuck you and lie to your face. Some people are glad-handlers and many people mistake that for true friendship…..when you leave the scene you are out of their minds like characters in a play, you just fill the moment. Some people will say they are behind you all the way, and they may be, but their inactivity will not help you day-to-day in the ugly fight that has been unleashed. People get ugly fast, and will stop at nothing……writing, saying, and doing anything to impugn your character. People who are for you may in their passion hurt you and need to calm their passion, for what is said in anger cannot be taken back and may splash back at you.
The fight never seems fair from either side. Life isn’t fair and neither is campaigning. It is the tough that prevail and once in the race you must hang tough ’til the end for the opposition is just hoping for any chink in your armor to take you down. I’ve learned I’m stronger than I thought, but it’s sad that we need to be so strong to fight a fight that should not have to be fought so negatively. I’ve learned that I’m not willing to get down and dirty slinging mud. Let them fight dirty and if they win that way, have at it!
So, looking at this microcosm of life I realize that the few that do want to get involved in the politics run them while the masses are running around having fun and living, they are making the decisions that change our lives and obviously not always for the good. If we’re not aware, it can get out of control before we notice that control has been lost. We all need to take a more active role in the behind the scenes politics that shape every facet of our lives. To give power blindly to people you think are “nice” or “better than the other candidate” is not acceptable. You should vote for the most qualified candidate and be educated about the candidate. I wanted to be that candidate, I wanted to be my own individual self, Evelyn “Evie” Garone, the most qualified candidate.
Evelyn Garone 4.15.14